A player will try to impress you with his outward appearance, his ego, and his money. Take some time to try and get to know him on a more personal level. [2] X Research source
When he walks over to thank you for the drink, use the opportunity to strike up a conversation. [4] X Research source Don’t let him make the conversation about sex. Try to talk to him about his friends, or what he likes to do. Pay attention to what he says, and be wary if he starts to lead the conversation in the wrong direction. [5] X Research source
If you know he is free on a certain night of the week, make a suggestion that the two of you go out. Try telling him something like, “We should go get a bite to eat, or maybe grab a drink. " Keep it casual, and take the pressure off the situation.
Be careful taking a player into crowded spaces, especially bars. Just because he came with you doesn’t mean he won’t be talking to other women.
Don’t be too obvious about it. Let him think it was his idea all along.
Let him know that you’ve got a life outside of him, and that you’re going to spend time with your friends. If you cancel on your friends to hang out with him, he’ll feel like he already has you, and he may soon lose interest. [8] X Research source
If you’re making out, and he says wants to take things further, don’t let him. Tell him something like, “I’m not going to sleep with you tonight, but I had fun with you. Call me sometime. " Then, give him a smile, or a wink, and just walk away. Leave him wanting only you. [10] X Research source Don’t sleep with him until you are completely sure you are ready to take that step with him. Keep in mind that even if you make him wait, he may see you as just another sexual conquest. Players are not likely to quit being players until they are ready. [11] X Research source
Don’t just hang out with him late at night when he calls. The next time he calls you late at night, tell him he’d have better luck if he called you during the day. When he calls you during the day, keep your word. [13] X Research source
Don’t become so focused on spending time with him that you stop paying attention to the rest of your life. You don’t have to start ignoring him, but you should give him something to look forward to. [15] X Research source
If you start calling him a lot, or trying to occupy every minute of his time, you will only succeed in pushing him away. He’ll start to view you as “clingy” or “needy. " If you want him to chase you, you have to give him the space to do so. [17] X Research source
Pressuring your guy to commit puts you in a vulnerable position and gives him all the power in the relationship. If you want him to settle down, there needs to be a balance of power.
Take the time to get to know his friends. Keep an open mind and show an interest in them. [19] X Research source If you find out you don’t like his friends, but he insists on spending all his time with them, drop a hint that you need some attention. Don’t force him to make a choice, but be clear with your needs. [20] X Research source
This doesn’t mean you need to spend all your time and energy trying to please him. But you should put your best foot forward and make him realize how good you are.
Keep doing the things you did when you first started hanging out. Don’t assume that once you’ve asked him out, you’re finished. Keep trying to entertain each other. The more positive experiences you can create, the more likely it is he’ll want to stick around.
Don’t plan everything in advance. Try to be spontaneous with your activities. If something comes up and you both want to do it, then go do it. You’ll both have fun, and he’ll see that he can still have an exciting life without having to be a player.
